Kindness and the ol’ plank

20140123-103841.jpgŸesterday a friend shared this link.
The intent of this series of pictures is to illustrate that we are all doing the best we can, we are not in competition with eachother and that other families can make different choices and that can still be ok.
But, that is not what rose up in me.
What rose up in me was judgement, criticism, rightness…. and then sprouted from my very eye a rather large plank.
Vision abstructed, danger danger!

There is a kindness in focusing on your own stuff. This kindness communicates that I don’t base my friendship with you on how much I approve of you. It says, I don’t have to comment on our differences to have a connection with you. It says, we can be different and that can be a good thing!

But this is quite hard to do, because in the court of our minds, we might actually believe a lie. Our hearts yearn to be better than someone… We want to think that we are exceptional, especially if it means that we have to compare ourselves to come out on top.

Our feelings of superiority often come at the cost of others.

We are not exceptional because of how we spank or don’t…
How much your two year old obeys…
Whether you cook or not…
Are a perfectionist or fly by the seat of your pants…
I am not exçeptional because I speak multiple languages or cook like a motha…
I am not exceptional because I think I sin less in certain ways than you….

If I had a siren that went off everytime I found myself sitting around thinking about how great I am at something, in comparison to someone else, it could get pretty noisy around here.

Wait! This post is supposed to be about kindness right!?

I am going to be kind to us both, and bossy… Ready?

Stop it. Stop it… With me.

Every time you feel the need to give unsolicited negative input. Shut.yo.mawf.

When your thoughts wander to comparison… Zip your lips.

When silly disaproval of others seeps into your mind, curse it to hell where it came from, OUT LOUD if you have to!

I promise you, this will not just be kind to others, it is doing yourself a huge kindness. You will set your mind free to concentrate on the truth about what gives us value, the essence of the Good News that whispers, no! it SHOUTS!!!
GRACE!

Last week I read a small book by Timothy Keller. It’s super cheap on Kindle and I recommend it. The essence of what Keller says boils down to this….
“I don’t care what you think of me, I don’t even care what I think of me. I only care what He thinks of me.”

If we worked from and through this perspective, we might find ourselves transformed and living in freedom. We might even find that the people around us become a bit more free…
Wouldn’t that be amazing? What a fantastic sort of kindness!

I won’t even ask if you struggle with this… It is human to. I will ask, will you quit with me? Will you move in the direction of freedom?

7 Responses to “Kindness and the ol’ plank”

  1. John says:

    For her age, Evangeline’s insights into the machinations of the human condition are incredible!

  2. mom says:

    Thank you Anita for not judging me for being “mas cuadrada” !

  3. Angela says:

    This was so refreshing to read – thanks so much for posting this reflection! It is a beautiful one. Just like you Anita. Thanks for loving me unconditionally too!

  4. Jesseka says:

    I was just thinking this morning about how we treat grace- like a funnel… receiving loads of it, letting a little trickle out…

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